Happy Sunday Everyone:
I was between two titles today. What’s above, and “no one cares”. Lot of thoughts for me personally this week. We had a celebration of life for one of my dad’s best friends, Paul, after an admirable battle with cancer. We had my 49th birthday a couple of weeks ago, and had my dad’s service back in January, hence the 2 celebrations of life and a birthday. Sitting back in my 49th year, my dad’s sudden passing, the shock of my life, watching one of his friends service and all that was shared, I can’t help but sit back and think of what is important and what is not. The “no one cares” piece comes in from our numbers being quite good in August. When your numbers are good you get posted on the corporate website, like so many companies (breeds competition, which is good) but with all I’m thinking about, I’m laughing at myself for putting too much importance on a number that “no one” cares about. I’ll try to bring this full circle down below.
I know the cliches that you experience at a celebration of life. I know the midlife crisis one is supposed to experience in their 40’s. The cliches exist for a reason (because they’re real), the midlife crisis, I’d swap out for gaining some form of wisdom as I age/mature/contemplate what’s important and what’s not. Paul, like my dad, was old school. He lived with honor, his friends weren’t wondering where they stood, his family admired him and loved him. He was a quiet giant. It was so evident in their stories, friends from 5 years old, his son in law, his neighbors, everyone that spoke had the same tone, the same undercurrent of respect and admiration. Best story I heard is he had multiple rental properties on the same street. His friend from 5 years old drove down the street on Tuesday in a moment of nostalgia, only to find Paul’s tenants flying flags at half-mast (100% on their own accord). How do you have to treat people for that to take place? What kind of an impact do you have to have on someone for that to happen?
So going back to our team’s volume and the concept of “no one cares”. I care, our team cares, our team’s family members care, but that’s really it, and that should be it. Perhaps from a pure competitive standpoint, people within a range of us (up or down) cares as a benchmark to get to, winning the race, that’s all good. But for me to sit back and allocate some level of significance to that number is silly and not important. I’m bringing this up because of the misconception and stories we tell ourselves as to what is important and what is not. When you watch and hear the stories being told at someone’s celebration of life, and the impact guys like Paul & Tom, had on the people around them, I quickly get reminded the most important things in life are the relationships you keep. In my opinion, the relationships you keep are a direct correlation to the life you lived. That’s the long game. That’s the race I want to win.
I know I’m not conveying the exact meaning that’s in my head and heart on this today, which is driving me nuts. Our celebrations of lives will be based on the meaningful relationships we had in our lifetimes, not much else. There is a peace in the simplicity of all of this. Makes me want to sit on the mountain top and scream no one cares how many likes you get. “Likes” serves as a metaphor for every unimportant measuring stick, you’re currently using to value you.
Thank you, Dad, & Paul, for reminding me, through your lives, what is important at the end of the road, its crystal clear. Love you, both!