Happy Sunday Everyone:
I was having dinner at my buddy’s house 3 weeks ago. Two couples and one other buddy whose wife was sick. The single guy, can’t mention his name as he will be found out, is the best. Literally one of the greatest humans I’ve ever known. Qualifies for all the makings of a best friend. Fight on your behalf, party w/ you until 3 in the morning but help you clean at 6:00AM, always there for you, does the right thing, phenomenal dad, husband, he lives life daily as it should be lived…just a ton of goodness, also entirely humble. He’s highly successful in his work although people don’t really know it…of course because he doesn’t talk about it. So we’re sitting in the kitchen and he has this grin on his face, and says “sorry you guys, I need to tell someone what happened to me today”. He goes on to tell us a story about his day. He’s in commercial real estate, he has helped this one client for the past 7 years, they love him for all the same reasons I love him. He puts together this small transaction for them, and he’s on the buy side, so seller is paying commission, commission is a relatively small number. He gets a call from the company purchasing the property and they ask for a broker demand. He explains, as they already knew, the sellers are covering commission. The guy on the other line then proceeds to tell him his group got together, they talked about everything my friend had done for them, and were issuing a 6 figure check to him for always being there, always representing them correctly, always having their back. Basically my buddy woke up to a normal day and in the middle of it had someone issue him a six figure check for being the guy that he is. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a smart business guy but there are a lot of smart business people who don’t have people proactively issuing unrequested six figure checks. You’ve got to be loved for this to happen. We’re in the kitchen high fiving each other, giving him a hug, laughing our asses off….here’s my point, being there to celebrate the wins with people you care about is awesome and I believe we have to do more of it. I also believe, me especially, not celebrating your own wins is selfish and demotivating to those around you. I almost lost my team a few years ago after finishing first at RPM. My team is there trying to fund every last loan on the planet, which they did, they called me w/ massive excitement when we won only for me to say “Great, thank you”. What a jackass, Erica still talks about how demotivated she felt hanging up the phone with me, like “why did we just do all of this”…..When you’re the leader, you have a responsibility to celebrate the win. When you’re solo, there are still people around you that want to celebrate with you, your spouse, your kids, your parents, your friends. One thing I’ve realized about myself is my own insecurities of comparing myself to others, as though I’m in competition, completely goes away when I find myself having true (NOT FALSE) joy and gratitude for someone else’s success. Whether we have more joy for others when we’re thinking less of ourselves, or thinking less of ourselves which creates more joy for others…not sure…chicken or the egg, I just know celebrating wins, wins, and I’m going to do more of it moving forward, for everyone around me, and myself. Not to end on a negative note but not celebrating your wins, or the wins of someone around you can only stem from a lack of gratitude, a false humility, or both.
Find something to celebrate this week, it beats the crap out of the alternative!!